Don’t Stare Without a Smile – The Easiest Way to Encourage Parents

Anyone who is a parent has been there: at the grocery store somewhere around lunch time and nap time. You just need a few things and are trying to make fast decisions, but then your kid, for no reason or for every reason, loses it. The meltdown has happened. In the next moments you are trying to finish your thoughts about what to get and get out of the store. And in the meantime, you know, all eyes are upon you.

Of course it’s human nature to put our gaze on something that’s loud or disruptive. And sometimes it’s hard to look away. Depending on your personality and personal experience, I have a few bits of advice on how to be a help in these moments.

The first option if you see a parent with a crying child is just to look away and go about your shopping. There’s no need to stare, roll your eyes, internally compare your child (real or imaginary) to theirs, or to mumble about anyone’s behavior to anyone else. One of the worst feelings is when you think your child is disrupting other people. The truth is they may be disrupting your grocery store zen, but they don’t need to know that or have your glares make them feel even worse.

However, if in your glance at the loud commotion, you catch the eye of the mom or dad with the sad child, just smile. Not a jolly smile, but a compassionate “you’re going to make it” smile. It shouldn’t be long, but it should be sincere.

If you are seasoned, older parent, don’t offer advice; give encouragement. I have two wonderful memories of seasoned parents, total strangers, who made me feel that parenting out in the world wasn’t going to be so bad.

The very first time my husband and I went out to eat with our daughter, she was about 6 weeks old, and we went to Torchy’s Tacos. Torchy’s isn’t fancy, but that didn’t matter. She started getting fussy, and I nervously looked around the restaurant to see who we were disturbing with our crying baby. It was winter and too cold to go outside, so my husband and I took turns rocking and bouncing and soothing while the other took quick bites of tacos.

The first person we apologized to was a man sitting solo at the table next to us. His response, “I’m traveling for work and I have 3 kids at home. This makes me feel like I’m right at home. I’m happy here; your baby isn’t going to bother me at all.” And he stayed at the table. He could have been lying through his face, but his kindness fell so gently on us as new parents.

Then along came an older couple and they intentionally sat at the other table next to us. The elderly lady put her hand on my shoulder and said, “We’re going to sit right here, and your baby isn’t going to bother us at all. You just keep right on eating. We’ve all been there.” She must have overheard our apology to the man and preemptively assured us that we were going to be just fine.

In that one meal, I felt so encouraged by how gracious people could be about crying kids.

Fast forward a year and a half to the grocery store. I was very pregnant with our 2nd kid, and my daughter was refusing to get into the shopping cart. While I worked to get her bucked up, a lady runs over to me and said, “We’ve all been there. It gets better. You’re doing a great job.” And then she jets out to the parking lot. That was it, but I walked into that store with such assurance. I relished in the stranger’s words for the rest of the day.

I still do.

Extending grace to people, parents or not, should be common practice, and the more you do it, the easier it will be. There is also a chance the stranger you showed a small kindness to will write about you in her blog post because it was one of the most encouraging moments of her life.

5 Ways to Treat Mom this Valentine’s Day

If you have a mom in your life whether your wife, your daughter or your own mom, you are probably looking for a way to show her your love this Valentine’s Day. As moms, we would love any of these. There is definitely one for you.

 

 

A necklace with her kids’ names – I know this is kind of Mother’s Day-y, but if you’re buying for a new mom, her heart will melt over this thoughtful piece of jewelry by Layered and Long.

 

 

 

Flowers – I know roses are classic and they are beautiful, but let me recommend a bouquet of peonies. You don’t have to add any greenery or filler to them, so if you can’t splurge on this Neiman Marcus arrangement, just buy a short, square vase and scout out peonies at your local florist or grocery florist.

 

 

Chocolate – The good stuff. If you’re a novice chocolate buyer, just know the higher the percentage, the less sweet it is because there’s more pure cacao in it. SRSLY chocolate is one of our most favorite Austin companies because good chocolate is one of our most favorite things.

 

 

A pretty dress – My mother-in-law frequently gifts me clothes and I feel so special. Of course this one requires you to know the mom’s size and style, but gifting a dress makes her feel pretty and fresh and ready to receive compliments. (Everyone compliments a lovely dress.) If she’s expecting, this is an especially thoughtful gift because she might be less inclined to make many clothing purchases. Dresses featured can be found here, here, and here.

 

Of course we’re Mama Bird Box. Our favorite way to show a mom or mom-to-be how fabulous she is is to give her the pregnancy subscription box, Mama Bird Box. This month’s box has pampering items galore to help her feel all the love. It’s also a gift that can keep giving each month, so share the love again and again well beyond Valentine’s Day. Check out with the coupon code LOVE to get 15% off any order. Coupon expires at the end of the month.

Darling Hostess Presents for Holiday Parties

Bringing a hostess present to your holiday parties can often become an afterthought but the gesture goes a long way. Here’s a collection of our 7 favorite gift ideas that will suit your host and your budget.

The Can’t-Go-Wrong Gift

Illume Soy Candles – Balsam & Cedar or Winter White scent come boxed and ready to give. $52.00

 

 

For the Hostess Who Loves Pretties

Loren Hope studs – Not everyone loves a dangle but everyone loves a stud. Loren Hope studs are statement pieces that can be worn every day. There are so many colors to choose from, too. $36.00

FOR THE Hostess Who Lives Real Life

Mom Life T-shirts – Usually we wouldn’t recommend buying clothes for someone unless they are your absolute bestie, but t-shirts are pretty simple. There isn’t a mom out there who would smile after getting one of these cute tees. *See another style below. $36.00

 

For the Hostess Who Cooks the Mostest

Rifle Paper Company Recipe Box – If your host likes to actually cook the food that she serves, then this is a great gift. Make it more thoughtful and personal by adding a couple of your favorite recipes to the tin before you gift it. $34.00

 

The Practical Gift That Doesn’t Look Practical

Clutch – We can never have too many of these little bags. Switching between bags is so easy and you look way more organized than you are. Bonus points on the gift if your host still requires a diaper bag. $18

 

The Best For Your Budget

Succulent Ring Dish – You don’t have to break the bank to bring a sweet, thoughtful gift. This darling dish is under $10 so you can say yes to all of your party invitations! $6

 

Our Favorite For Him

Guys can host killer parties, too. This mason jar wrap by Humble Goods is unique and sure to make your host feel appreciated. P.S. If you don’t love Austin as much as we do, there’s a beautiful desert scene, too. $25

 

 

All items except the mason jar can be found at Cameo Boutique in Mandeville, Louisiana. Not in Mandville? Us either, but we love to shop their Instagram. They ship!

Anyone else relating to this image? This tee might need to be for you. Happy Holidays!